Ep. 14: DOUBLE DINOBOT

Ep. 14: DOUBLE DINOBOT

Paul: Ep. 14: DOUBLE DINOBOT

Me: Why did Ged's otak have to die? :'(

Paul: Either it's a double date with Waspinator and Spidergirl or Bill from Pokemon is up to his old tricks!

Paul: Who is Ged Otak

Paul: Okay episode 14.

Paul: First words of Moby Dick: "Call me Ishmael."

Paul: First words of episode 14 of Beast Wars: "NUCLEATE THE THERMOCOILS."

Paul: Oh damn mutator beams.

Paul: Megatron is a bit of a mad scientist.

Paul: HE'S CLONED DINOBOT.

Paul: "I'll send in the clone."

Paul: Dinobot has those bad-ass eye-beams.

Paul: Pterrorsaur is dodging like a champ.

Paul: Dinobot's beast mode is so fucked.

Paul: His hips are super low to the ground.

Paul: Rust in peace, old coooomrrraaaade.

Paul: Wow Terrorbird was a boss this episode.

Paul: He's OP.

Paul: Just like Rattrap is a total boss, completely OP.

Paul: hahaha this clone spy sucks.

Paul: He's with Rattrap now.

Paul: And there's no way anybody's pulling anything over on Rattrap.

Paul: Dinobot betrays Ratrap on the same planet where Anakin betrayed Obi-Wan and got his arms cut off.

Paul: Coincidence?

Paul: Optimus will rue the day he left this clone alone.

Paul: This clone sucks.

Paul: The fucking SPACESHIP knows he's fishy!!

Paul: Rattrap surfs and it plays surfing music.

Paul: I swear this has already happened.

Paul: Surfs on the lava.

Paul: Omg this clone is a douche.

Paul: I think the animators have gotten better at matching the faces to the emotions of the botz.

Paul: They’re very cartoony.

Paul: What in the inferno are youu??

Paul: The honorable dinosaurs are having an honorable battle.

Paul: This clone must die.

Paul: So annoying.

Paul: Yes I think it did

Paul: Anyways Dinobot’s eye-beam is now versus Megatron’s Rex-Laser!!

Paul: What the fuck

Paul: What the fucking fuck

Paul: Okay um

Paul: Serious honorable Dinobot ate his clone alive, makes a joke about it, and then burps comically as over-the-top doofus drunk clown music plays.

Paul: All the Maximals are like WHAT.

Me: In a later episode you see his skin hanging on the wall of Dinobot's quarters.

Paul: Hahahahaha holy fucking shit.

EPISODE 15: THE SPARK

Paul: Ep. 15 the Spark.

Paul: Okay so a stasis pod was hit by a meteor in a STUNNING 3D SEQUENCE.

Paul: Tarantino is watching it in his spider cave sex dungeon and cackles, clearly thinking about the next bombshell slut robot he can build.

Paul: But Megatron super creeps on him.

Paul: Rhinox is just um hanging out next to the energon geysers.

Paul: Just chillin

Paul: in Predakhan territory for some reason.

Paul: Okay now like everybody has randomly seen the stasis pod so cool.

Paul: OMG remember when Megatron wanted to clone everybody on his team? Good character moment.

Paul: OF EVIL.

Paul: Suddenly a shot of a hawk. This robot animal will be Tobias!

Paul: By which I mean a hawk. And seeing as hawks are neither dinosaurs nor groaty, I predict a Maximal victory.

Paul: Hahahahaha Scorponok is a loyal man.

Paul: He’s loyal to evil.

Paul: Literally the only one on the show.

Paul: It’s dying noo.

Paul: Taigatan runs like shit.

Paul: Black Spiderlady cyber-venoms Black White Tiger.

Paul: Hahahahahahahahaha

Paul: I fucking love how fucking apple-pie this show is.

Paul: So good-Christian-values, support-our-troops.

Paul: Every Cybertron, Maximal or Predacon, has a Spark.

Paul: Robosoul.

Paul: Cheetar’s fucking face....

Paul: DONT COUNT ON IT, WEB BREATH

Paul: BOUNCING BREAKERS THE BUG IS BACK

Paul: jesus

Paul: Dude okay so Cheetar is bring a total bad-ass this episode.

Paul: Black Widowtron has him on the ropes but he catches her own cybervenom dart and throws it back in her face.

Paul: That was hardcore.

Paul: Also something that makes sense for the YOUNG SPEED character to do.

Paul: Hahahahaha Waspinator the lovable retard appears!

Paul: WHO DARES ATTACK WASPINATOR?

Paul: I’m genuinely digging the stakes here. The whole 2 versus two.

Paul: 1.

Paul: Not two.

Paul: Terrorsaur turned up.

Paul: Hawk’s animation and voice suck.

Paul: Sexy lady bird??

Paul: WHEN A SPARK GOES ONLINE, THERE IS GREAT JOY.

Paul: Yeah and what if the spark is Adolf Hitler?

Paul: Checkmate, Americans.

Me: This episode invented the concept of the spark, which has featured in every subsequent interaction of Transformers! 

Paul: What is Femhawk’s name?

Me: AIRAZOR.

Paul: Ayer razón.

Paul: Hoy, equivoco.

Me: In the Japanese dub they made her a man and she and Tigatron are gay together.

Paul: Oh dang really?

Paul: Very powerful samurai ideas.